Crackdown on Runaway Dads – my thoughts

Here I am again climbing onto my soapbox. The reason? An article in today’s Sunday Mirror called – ‘Crackdown on Runaway Dads.’

Of course I agree that fathers should be forced to sign their baby’s birth certificate, unless there are exceptional circumstances where it might put mother and baby in danger. But, when I see the quote by Labour MP David Lammy, who says,

‘We should have high expectations of all fathers, and help them to live up to those expectations. And we should be very clear that it is not acceptable for fathers to decide to play no role in their children’s lives ‘

I get very angry. All fathers and I mean ALL FATHERS should play a part in their children’s lives, so why has my son been excluded from his children’s lives for over nine years? Because his ex-wife refused to let him see them; brainwashed them into thinking their father didn’t want them, but all the time taking money off him every month for their support.

Why don’t MP’s take the side of decent fathers for once? Why don’t they create laws which stop these women from obstructing court orders? My son’s ex-wife has blatantly ignored all court orders instructing her to allow my son access for so many years now, that he has given up the fight. In my view, family courts are a waste of time and money. They make rulings, mothers disregard them, fathers repeatedly go back to court, the same court makes the same rulings, the same mothers continue to disregard the rulings and so it goes on; for years and years.

My grandsons have another man in their life who acts as their father, while their real father can only hope and pray that one day, they will realise there is another man in their life who has never stopped loving them and decide to come in search of him. Then, just maybe, they will come and see me, because I too have been denied access to my grandsons.

Guest Post – Jane Riddell

I would like to thank Jane for guesting on my blog.

Thanks, Shirley, for inviting me as a guest blogger.
I am a Scottish writer of contemporary novels, based in Edinburgh. Although I also write short stories, generally my ideas lend themselves to works of book length, and I find it difficult to downsize.
I underwent several metamorphoses before becoming a full time writer. For a long time, I worked in the NHS, initially as a dietitian, then as a health promoter. During those years I wrote as a hobby but was never caught up enough in it to work on something for more than a couple of hours at a time. My first novel, Seychelles Song, was rejected by Mills & Boon as not being up to the high standard their readers expect. In it I committed the cardinal error of having the heroine make a move on the hero when they found themselves sharing a bed. And apparently the setting dominated the plot. We live and learn! I would cringe if anyone were to read this book now….
In 2006 we decided to move to France for several years. As I was unlikely to find paid work there because of my limited French, I knew I’d have more time for writing. What I didn’t know was that we would end up homeschooling our son…. a story in itself and one which prompted the writing of various articles. Several months before we left Edinburgh, during a Saturday afternoon at the gym, I found myself on the treadmill, listening to Martha Reeves and the Vandellas singing Dancing in the Street, and thinking: I’ll have a go at becoming a serious writer.
I completed my second novel, Chergui’s Child, while we were in France. I also wrote the first draft of what has become my debut novel, Water’s Edge, e-published by ThornBerry Publishing in April 2013.
In terms of possessing a writing identity, it wasn’t until we were halfway through our time in Grenoble that I found myself able to tell people I was a writer, without wrestling with my internal critic, which would say: A writer? Who are you trying to kid?
When we returned to the UK, I studied for a Masters in Creative Writing which I attained in 2010. Around that time, I began blogging: Papillon – any thoughts rattling around my head, and Letters from Bakhtin blog – about a Russian cat who aspires to be a writer. In 2011 I set up a small editing business, Choice Words Editing, being particularly interested in working for non-native English speaking clients.
Writing is something I have to do. There’s definitely a sense of deprivation if, for some reason, I can’t write, though this rarely happens. If I’m away from home for one night even, my laptop accompanies me. We have done a fair bit of travelling in our Renault Trafic van and as soon as the scenery becomes dull, or darkness falls, I am writing or editing away on my laptop. On a perpetual effort to lose weight, I write or edit with my laptop perched on the handlebars of my exercise bike. Eccentric, or what?
Writing is a space I can go to that is completely mine, in which I have total control: it’s not dependent on weather, colleagues, money. Additionally, as I tend to set my novels in ‘foreign’ countries, I have the chance to escape to a sunny climate when those around me are enduring yet another blustery, wet, Edinburgh day.
I am currently completing a rewrite of Chergui’s Child which I hope to submit soon. My editing guide: Words’Worth – a fiction writer’s guide to serious editing will be published by ThornBerry Publishing in July 2013, and will be available in paperback from Amazon.
The task for me – as well as continuing to write novels – is to learn how to promote/market my work, something publishers are far less involved in now. I thought that becoming published was the final summit. How naive!

Readers can connect with me via:
my author’s website: http://www.quietfiction.com
my editing website: http://www.choicewordsediting.co.uk

If any author would like to ‘guest’ on this blog, then please contact me – shirley.ford@mail.com and we can discuss it further.

Review of Water’s Edge by Jane Riddell

Water’s Edge by Jane Riddell
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

On the surface, this was a book about four siblings invited to the hotel run by their mother in Switzerland, for a family reunion. All very innocent, making you wonder where the story was going. But then, you gradually realise that Magdalena’s three daughters and son all have problems which rise to the surface and have to be dealt with. Meanwhile Magdalena has her own problems, which she has hidden from her children since her husband’s death. The story revolves around each character’s point of view. How they are forced to confront issues in their life, how they feel about their siblings; their relationship with their mother, who suffers a great deal of guilt at having sent them to boarding school as children. The characters are believable; sometimes irritating and annoying, but that is the skill shown by the writer. I thoroughly enjoyed this character-led book.

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Photo for Saturday 8th June 2013 – Trebah Garden

This is one of the stunning views of Trebah Garden, a sub-tropical paradise set in a beautiful Cornish valley.

For more information visit http://www.trebahgarden.co.uk

If you like this photo, please sign up for my blog for more great photos of the South West of England

Quotation for Friday 7th June 2013

The quotation for today comes from ‘The Magic’ by Rhonda Byrne -

‘If you practice gratitude a little, your life will change a little. If you practice gratitude a lot every day, your life will change dramatically and in ways that you can hardly imagine.’

Today, I am grateful for the lovely peaceful walk I had with Bailey (that’s him pictured above). The lunchtime I spent with a very good friend putting the world to rights. The books I have sold and the Euro Millions Lottery Ticket I bought which is bound to be a winner!

What are you grateful for today? Let me know, I would love to hear.

Review of Hostile Witness by Rebecca Forster

Hostile Witness by Rebecca Forster
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I love books about courtroom dramas, and this is one of the best I have read in a long time. I thoroughly enjoyed the story from beginning to end. It was free too! Josie Bates is a great character and I now have the other Witness books on my wish list.

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Guest Post – Author Joe Conlan

Well hey there Shirley Ford fans. I’m very honored to be invited and have the opportunity to write for you. Let me first introduce myself. My name is Joe Conlan. I am a retired trial lawyer turned author. Have you ever heard of that before? For the first several years of my career, I was a prosecutor for the State of Florida. I then turned to civil practice, representing corporations, doctors, nurses etc for personal injury cases filed against them. The novel I wrote, titled Nameless, is a crime fiction thriller.

I’m not your typical writer. I hear from so many other authors that they have been writing since they can remember. There’s no question, I cannot say the same. In fact, I never much liked it as a youngster. If you would have given me a calculus problem to work out or a chapter from a science book to memorize, I would have been happy as a clam. When it was time to write an essay for English class, I dreaded it. My grades for my writing were quite mediocre. The one thing I can say, however, is that I always enjoyed a good read. I have been an avid reader of fiction since my early teenage years. I admired and idolized any author who could take me into a fantasy world, craft characters that would become my friends and force me to read until the wee hours of the night because I couldn’t put the book down.

Whenever I admire or idolize someone, I have often challenged myself to become more like them. At 11 years old, I was obsessed with Walt Frazier of the New York Knicks professional basketball team. I know. I’m aging myself. In any event, my own personal basketball career started upon discovering Mr. Frazier. I would play for hours a day practicing foul shots until I was ultimately able to sink more than 90 out of hundred. It was more perseverance than any innate talent. That’s just me. I tell you that story only because once I became a fan of Stephen King and Anne Rice as a young adult, I wanted to be able to do what they did. I just didn’t try until I was 50 years old.

Even then, I really didn’t know whether I was capable of creating an entire novel. Based on my grades in writing class, one would say probably not. But, that didn’t stop me. Well, let’s say, I eventually got to it. It all started the day my daughter turned 20. The family was gathered for her birthday. I was retired by that time. During conversation, I announced, out of the blue, that I have always wanted to write a novel. My father-in-law, in his inimitable fashion then inquired, “What the hell is keeping you from doing it?” My ex-wife chimed in that I should write about a cruise ship murder. That very day, the first words of Nameless were on paper.

After starting to write, I still had no idea whether I had any skill or talent. So, I asked several members of my family and friends who were avid readers to read as I wrote. I begged them to be brutally honest with me as I didn’t want to waste my time. Fortunately, it turned out that I couldn’t write the book fast enough for them. Any thriller fans interested in checking out Nameless can visit my website, joeconlan.com. It is currently on sale for 99 cents, 49 pence in the UK and has a 4.9 star out of 5 rating on Amazon.com and 4.81 stars on Goodreads. Very briefly, as I don’t want to overwrite my welcome, it is about the psychological and intellectual struggle between a young FBI Special Agent in Charge and a deranged, but brilliant serial murderer. Many thanks to Shirley for the invitation and to you for taking the time to read this.
Joe Conlan

Saturday Photo – Durdle Door in Dorset

This is Durdle Door, the rock formation which resembles a huge dragon dipping its head into the sea. Durdle Door is part of the Jurassic Coastline in Dorset. More information on the rock formation can be found on Wikipaedia.

For more photos of the South West, please follow this blog.

Friday Quote by Claire Rayner

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The quote this week comes from Claire Rayner, taken from Wisdom for Our Times
‘This too will pass.
I was taught these words by my grandmother as a phrase that is to be used at all times in your life. When things are spectacularly dreadful; when things are absolutely appalling; when everything is superb and wonderful and marvellous and happy – Say these four words to yourself. They will give you a sense of perspective and help you also to make the most of what is good and be stoical about what is bad.’

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Photo of Corfe Castle, Saturday 25th May 2013

Corfe Castle in Dorset – an awe inspiring place to visit – the following excerpt is taken from the National Trust site – Visit http://www.nationaltrust.org.uk for more information.

‘Thousand-year-old royal castle shaped by warfare
Enjoy one of Britain’s most iconic and evocative survivors of the English Civil War, partially demolished in 1646 by the Parliamentarians.
A favourite haunt for adults and children alike, you can’t fail to be captivated by these romantic castle ruins with breathtaking views across Purbeck.
Discover 1,000 years of our history as a royal palace and fortress. With fallen walls and secret places, there are tales of treachery and treason around every corner.
Spot the ‘murder holes’ and count the arrow loops. Feel history come to life and see the wildlife that has set up home here.’

The town itself is also worth a visit with its quaint shops and cafes serving cream teas. You can’t possibly leave without sampling a cream tea!

If you like this photo, please follow my blog for more photos from around the South West of England.